Dear Eden,


Today, at the young age of 9 months, 27 days you had surgery.  Not something I imagined doing with my infant and yet as we got ready for this yesterday I thought about how minor this surgery was and how blessed we've been with two beautiful, healthy children.  And yet ... at 2am your dad and I were both awake and tossing and turning in bed thinking about what would happen in the coming hours.


You had surgery on your right ear and it helped that the doctor was completely nonchalant about it.  We started our day at 5:40 in order to be completely ready and out the door in order to drop Canaan off with Katie Tassy so your dad and I could both be with you.  We weren't able to feed you after 2am so your dad woke you and did that.  You were okay for awhile in the morning but by 8am you were cranky and hungry.  I could kick myself for not taking our camera but your dad said it was a weird thing to record before we left the house.  However, you in a teeny, tiny hospital gown with the Backyardigans on it was more adorable than I would have imagined.  


Only one person allowed to take you in so I got in some scrubs and let you to the operating room, where all of the nurses cooed over your blue, blue eyes.  Letting them strap the mask over your mouth was hard, watching your eyes roll back and your body go limp was harder, and walking away when they told me I had to leave was the hardest.  The doctor said your surgery would take 30-40 minutes, but we didn't hear anything until 1 hour and 10 minutes later.  I know this, because I was staring down the clock by that point.


When they let me know you were done I pretty much jumped from my chair and raced to the OR where you were sweaty, crying, confused and being held by two nurses and the anesthesiologist trying to put oxygen in your face.  Your cry sounded different and scratchy from being intubated.  You settled quickly into my arms and fell back into a dazed sleep.  The surgeon said everything went great.  Multiple nurses came and tried to cover you all up and I'm not going to lie, I definitely hoped you wouldn't pee on me since they hadn't put a diaper on you yet, but I fended them off as you were still all sweaty and warm.  


They had me wake you and feed you and I was glad that you're still nursing because this was something I could actually DO for you on this confusing day.  After about an hour I was able to take you back to the room with your dad.  Soon after we found out that we wouldn't be released as soon as expected so your dad left to pick up Canaan and get more food for you.  You played with an animal cracker and used my stomach as a pillow while a soccer game your dad had left on blared in the background.  Soon you lost interest, rolled onto your stomach and settled on top of me and fell dead asleep.  Something that would NEVER happen in real life.  I give you all these details of what will soon, hopefully, be a no-big-deal day in your life mostly because I want to remember those moments of you sleeping.  You're getting older and more independent and having a peaceful hour of you sleeping, your breaths shuddering in and out while constructions noises wafted through the window and soccer blared was a little bit of peace in the midst of our life right now.  And I'm glad I got to experience it with you little Edes.  


Since leaving the hospital at 1:30pm you've napped a bit more than usual but other than that you've been your happy self, pushing off and trying to stand determinedly, refusing any pureed foods in favor of solids to our consternation.  We're keeping a close eye on Canaan around you as we've explained how much it would hurt if he touched your head.  So far he's fascinated and asks to see your "owie" about every 20 minutes.  He wants a band-aid like yours.


Love,  Mom


0 #1 Emily 2012-10-05 13:57
I like this. Nice reflection on a day--experience s I remember as well. Glad everything went well. Nate, you're up next? :)

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